The Scarlet Letter: Part 2

Then, as now, trivial matters tend to take the forefront of public interest and political debate. Such is the case regarding the guardianship of Pearl. There is a considerable portion of the government of the opinion that if Pearl really is a demon child, she is a stumbling block to Hester’s redemption, and if she isn’t, she deserves more indoctrination than Hester can provide. Either way, she should be removed from Hester’s care.

Governor Bellingham is especially of this opinion, though this does not stop him from ordering some custom slapping gloves from Hester. One must challenge others to duels with style, after all.  Thus, Adulteress and the Demon Child head on over to deliver the gloves and convince him to let Hester keep her daughter. In preparation, Hester makes a dress of red fabric with elaborate gold trim for Pearl. All the fancy golden needlework basically makes her the living embodiment of the Scarlet Letter. What better way to convince an extra pious judge that you are not sinful than by reminding them of the very sin you are guilty of, right?

Along the way some children see the mother and daughter. Unlike the Demon Child, they have been raised in proper Puritan homes, and thus know instinctively that the best thing to do is fling mud at the pair. Before they can though, Pearl flies at them in a rage and they run away peeing themselves. At last Adulteress and the Demon Child arrive at the governor’s mansion and we get a description of the humble abode. The outer walls are plaster embedded with bits of colored glass so the whole thing glitters like jewels in the sun. An arched doorway with intricate stained glass opens to a columnated hall decorated in portraits of grumpy looking Bellingham ancestors. Along one wall stands a suit of shiny shiny armor that Bellingham wore while nobly slaughtering the Native population for daring to exist. Pearl is fascinated by this so Hester distracts her by pointing out the garden.

Governor Bellingham had attempted to make a proper English garden, and spectacularly failed in the attempt. All we see now are some pumpkins, cabbages, wild rosebushes, and apple trees. Hester speculates the roses and apple trees to be descended from the first ones planted by Reverend Blackstone.

According to the book’s footnotes, Blackstone was a founding settler of Boston, but left to get away from all the Puritans. Can’t imagine why.

Enough of this reverie though because here comes Bellingham and his crew. I am sure the Demon Child dressed as the embodiment of sin will be on her best behavior and everything will work out well.

Bellingham strolls in along with Reverend Wilson (who gave us that cheery lecture on sin and hellfire a few chapters ago), Reverend Dimmsdale (whose health has been poor the last few years due to extra strength sermoning) and Darth Chillingworth. I guess characters are in short supply since we haven’t met anyone new. They open the door to the hall and find Pearl.

Bellingham: Who do we have here? Looks like a tiny imp decorated in garish red fluff. What’s your name tiny elf?

Pearl: Demon Ch….er…I mean Pearl.

Bellingham: Pearl, more like Ruby, amirite? And who is your mother?

Pearl: Mother is my mother.

Bellingham: [notices Hester] Oh we were just talking about how you’re a terrible mother and we should take your child.

Hester: Actually I’m a great mom because I am continually learning how to guard her against crappy Puritans like you.

Bellingham: That’s MISTER Crappy Puritan to YOU and we’ll be the judge of that. Reverend Wilson, go quiz her on how bad she should feel about killing Jesus!

Wilson: Right-o. Tell me Pearl, do you know who made you?

Now, Pearl knew perfectly well all about her heavenly father and could have aced any catechism quiz, but as that was the expected answer, she dutifully did not give it. Instead she said that no one made her and she was plucked from a rose bush.

Wilson: Ooooo, wrong answer. Time to get taken away.

Hester: [clutches Pearl to her] Oh thems fightin’ words. Dimmsdale, tell him how that’s not gonna happen. Heavenly Father gave me this child. Are you saying God was wrong? You were my pastor so you know what’s what.

Dimmadale: [gulp] Yeah, she has a point. I mean, God knew all about the hanky panky that happened with Hester and….someone, yet saw fit to give her this child. Kiddo is clearly a blessing and a curse, what with her wacky antics. She is basically a living scarlet letter. Just look at how she’s dressed!

Wilson: Oh I thought that was just to mock us.

Dimmsdale: Nah she knows what she is doing. Pearl is the only thing keeping her from falling into deeper sin, and she knows that she serves as a cautionary tale to her daughter. If Hester raises her right and brings her to heaven, she knows it means her lesson is well learned and she maybe gets a get out of Hell free card, so kind of a win-win.

Bellingham: Fine, she can keep the child, but she has to go to school and church and whatnot when she is old enough. And eat her Wheaties. Which are totally a thing at this time and not an anachronism.

We are now treated to a retelling of Roger Chillingworth’s introduction to the story from his point of view:

He stumbles out of the forest, travel worn and hopeful of finding a loving home with his wife, only to find her on the pillory soaking up shame. A soon as he found out why from the random village person, he knew that there would be plenty of leftover shame for everyone related to her, and probably an extra portion for him if he revealed himself. So what motivation did he have to say who he really was? None. The only reasonable thing to do in a case like this is to seek revenge against the woman who is clearly already having a pretty bad time of things.

Thus he donned the moniker of Darth Chillingworth and joined the noble ranks of community healers. Current healthcare staff for the community consists of an aged deacon, a kindly yet inept apothecary, and a surgeon who spends most of his time as a barber and was only vaguely aware that organs are a thing that people have.

What Darth Chillingworth lacks in empathy he makes up for in medical skillz. That’s skillz with a z, by the way, which means it’s double plus good skill. His time among the natives taught him the medicinal properties of local plants, and he is able to brew healing potions, which is definitely not seen as witchcraft. His lack of empathy also makes him an exemplary member of the church. The author refers to him affectionately as “The Leech.”

He chooses Master Dimmsdale to be his spiritual guide, which works out, because right around the time of Chillingworth’s arrival, Dimmsdale’s health starts to fade for reasons unfathomable to the reader, but clearly fathomable to the townsfolk as being the result of overexerting himself being righteous. Lots of fasting and prayer and self deprecation and whatnot takes its toll, and if he dies its only because the world is unworthy of his holiness.

The arrival of such an emanate physician seemingly out of nowhere at the same time as the declining health of our holiest of holies seems to most as being divinely inspired. Some even claim he was was whisked away from a university in Germany and carried through the air to their backwater. Others realize that such a flamboyant miracle is preposterous and instead insist that it is just a regular strength miracle. No one seems to make the connection that both of these events coincide with the expulsion of Adulteress and the Demon Child.

Dimmsdale resists medical help, saying he is unworthy, but the other reverends tell him it is a sin to refuse, so there we are. Chillingworth takes a great interest in trying to understand him, so the two form an intimate bromance. They literally take long walks on the beach together. “For the sake of the minister’s health, and to enable the leech to gather plants with healing balm in them, they took long walks on the sea-shore, or in the forest, mingling various talk with the plash and murmur of the waves, and the solemn wind-anthem among the tree-tops.” See? bromance.

They take their bromance to the next level and move in together. Their landlady puts Dimmsdale in a small apartment with the walls covered in a tapestry depicting David and Bathsheba¹, cuz that’s not foreshadowing. Not at all. Also it is next to a graveyard. Great for his health, I’m sure.

Back to the story. Most people ship Dimmsdale and Chillingworth’s bromance. As time goes on and Dimmesdale’s health continues to decline though, some people think Chillingworth is an agent of the devil who learned the black arts from the “savages” and is using it to poison Dimmsdale. Guess we’ll see.

¹For those not familiar with this particularly heartwarming Biblical tale: King David is a peeping Tom and sees Bathsheba bathing one day. He gets all lusty and does the horizontal shuffle with her even though she is married to a soldier. She gets pregnant, so David orders the husband to the front lines of the fiercest battle. He dies, and David marries her.

Darth Chillingworth is totes sus that Dimmsdale is hiding something and he is determined to find out what in order to “help” him. Except, of course, for the fact that his probes into Dimmsdale’s psyche is described as a thief trying not to creak floorboards. He is convinced Dimmsdale has some dark secret but makes sure that he looks totally innocent whenever Dimmsdale looks his way. Dimmsdale, for his part, is oblivious because he is distrustful of everyone all the time, so his danger sense is…dim. One day they chat while Chillingworth is examining some weeds he gathered.

Dimmsdale: Watcha got there? They look sickly.

Chillingworth: Found them growing on an unmarked grave. Probably grew out of the sinful heart of the deceased. That would explain the sickly appearance. Should have confessed when he could I guess.

D: Maybe he wanted to but couldn’t.

C: Why not? What would stop him?

D: Could be he wanted to be able to still do good and he knew that if he confessed, no one would trust him anymore and his good works would be at an end. People will know he is not as righteous as he pretends and stop respecting him.

C: That sounds oddly specific, and also self-deluding.

D: Well not like we are talking about me or anything. Oh look! Is that Hester and Pearl walking outside? Let’s go take a look!

Surely enough, the fortuitous distraction is indeed Pearl laughing and dancing in the graveyard. I am sure that is scoring her huge points in the “Is she is a Demon Child?” department. Then she notices the two men and throws burrs at them. She runs aways to warn her mom not to be caught by the old man’s witchcraft as the minister so clearly has. Again, big points.

C: Well, I’ll say this for her, at least she doesn’t have any hidden sin like that sinful corpse (who is definitely not you) that you were talking about.

D: Yeah, sucks to be that guy, that’s for sure.

C: Sure would. Speaking of which, want a run down on your diagnosis?

D: Totally.

C: Right, well, still got nothing. Are you sure you’ve told me everything?

D: Of course.

C: Are you sure you’re sure? Cuz I can’t help you if you won’t help me.

D: Totes sure.

C: Well, in that case, I’m guessing it’s a malady of the spirit. Maybe telling someone the cause of the the spiritual trouble might help.

D: [suddenly shocked] Nope, I’m not telling! [Runs away]

Chillingworth sits and muses with his fingers pursed all evil villain style about reestablishing relations with his victim…er…friend. He figures it will be fairly easy since Dimmsdale is so malleable, and this is proven on the very next page, and not only that, but to reëstablish, which is even cooler because umlauts make everything cooler. Yes, Hawthorne spells it with an umlaut.

Dimmsdale soon feels guilty about his outburst, since a good Puritan must feel guilty about just about everything except judging the sins of other Puritans, and apologizes. Darth Chillingworth resumes his ministrations. One day he finds Dimmsdale fast asleep, so he creeps up and looks under the vestments covering the minister’s chest and is filled with the evil joy of evil and let’s out a silent MWAHAHAHAHAHAHA. It doesn’t say what he finds, but I am guessing a scarlet letter of Dimmsdale’s own.

With his newfound knowledge, Darth Chillingworth plots ways to mentally torture Dimmsdale. Dimmsdale suspects something is up, but as we established earlier, he is rather dim, so he chalks all his mental anguish up to reading too much into things Chillingworth says due to his own guilty conscience. In an ironic twist, he makes up for his perceived unjust view of Chillingworth by opening himself up even further. Is that actually irony? I’m not sure. I’ve always been a little hazy on the exact definition of irony. Anyway, Dimmsdale opens up about everything except exposing his secret, thinking it IS still a secret. Chillingworth is in turn delighted for the bountiful opportunities to be awful. Fate has placed him as the confidant of the very object of his revenge. And by fate I mean the author. And by the author I mean the person who willingly lived in a town he disliked because…reasons? I guess? Kind of feel like Hawthorne has a thing for willingly putting themselves in the way of torment.

The constant, visible turmoil of Dimmsdale makes him super famous because he is basically Puritan Gandhi – wasting away and suffering for the greater good of his flock. He tries to tell everyone how super wicked he is, but since he never spells out his exact sin, they just think he is super pious. The worse he feels, the more famous he gets, It is a feedback loop that nets the exact opposite reaction of what he wants. As an added bonus all the accolades give him imposter syndrome, which makes him feel even worse. So what does he do? Continues to make himself feel awful, naturally. As we all know, if there is anything Puritans love more than suffering, it is seeing other people suffer, so it’s a win-win for both him and the congregation. And Darth Chillingworth. It is the best of times by being simultaneously the worst of times for everyone involved.

Dimmsdale decides to pick up a hobby, so he gets a scourge (barbed whip) and whips himself for funsies. To complete the Gandhi suffering look he also starves himself. He suffers to the point he hallucinates people shunning him. I wonder what could possibly be causing his health to decline. One night after a fun filled “whip yourself till you pass out” party, a thought occurs to him of a new and exciting way to find peace. And by peace he probably means extra masochism, but I guess we shall see. He puts on his coat and walks out into the night towards the next chapter.

The minister walks to the scaffold where Hester once stood, and throws himself a midnight pity party. He invites his friends Remorse and Cowardice, who he personifies as sisters playing tug of war with him. One pushes him to admit his guilt while the other pulls him back just shy of actually doing so.

He lets out a cry of anguish so loud he is sure it will waken the whole town. After a moment only Governor Bellingham and the governor’s sister poke their heads out, look around, assume it was a witch flying with the devil, and go back to bed. It is common knowledge that such witch cries in the night are commonplace. Dimmsdale realizes it was probably much louder in his head. A minute later he sees a lone figure slowly making his way towards him, holding a lamp. Who could it be? Why it’s Reverend Wilson! He remembers that Governor Winthrop, who preceded Governor Bellingham, had come down with a bad case of being really old, and was nigh on death. The reverend must have been watching over him while he breathed his last. The light of the lantern makes him look as though he is bathed in a radiant halo.

This is a very important plot point and I am glad Hawthorne included it because at this point in our story, literally nothing interesting happens. Wilson doesn’t notice him and continues walking. Dimmsdale continues to sit in silence. I am really glad that Hawthorne included this totally important detail. So poetic.

Dimmsdale imagines standing there on the scaffold until morning. The early risers would see him and raise an alarm that a ghost was in the town square. Everyone would rush out to see who the ghostly visage was at first light and be horrified to find it was him. They would all know his evil deed instinctively. The horror of that fantasy makes him laugh maniacally. He comes back to himself and hears a child’s laugh in response. Oh the sweet sound of children’s laughter. At night. In a deserted town square.

Dimmsdale: Pearl, is that you?

Pearl: Yeppers

D: Is your mother with you?

P: Right again.

D: What are you doing here?

Hester: Taking measurements for Governor Winthrop’s death robes.

D: Oh, fun. Come join me.

[They join him on the scaffold]

P: Will you stand with us here tomorrow?

D: Oh heavens no. That would take actual courage, of which I definitely have none. I would much rather watch you two get shunned. I will stand with you and your mother at judgement day, but not in this life.

Just then a meteor blazes through the sky with such brightness that it illuminates the entire street. Dimmsdale imagines that he sees a fiery A trailing after it. Pearl laughs and points to it, or so he thinks, but then realizes that she is pointing to a man standing on the edge of the courtyard. Dimmsdale cries out in terror and implores Hester and Pearl to tell him who it is. Pearl offers to tell him and gestures for him to bend down so she can whisper it. When he does she blows a raspberry in his ear. Demon Child FTW!!!

He discerns it is Darth Chillingworth, who is practicing his lurking skills while grinning in a pretty creepy kind of way.

D: [To Chillingworth] Wha..what are you doing here?

C: I was tending to Winthrop along with pretty much every other main character in the book. Looks like you’ve been sleepwalking. Let me take you home.

Next morning is Sabbath and Dimmsdale gives a super duper sermon because the holiness of his sermons is directly proportional to how awful he feels. After last night he feels extra awful, so extra double bonus points for him! After the meeting the sexton (church groundskeeper) approaches him.

Sexton: Yo Dimmsdale, found one of your gloves on the scaffold this morning. Satan must have put it there.

D: Yeah, Satan for sure. We all know how fond he is of stealing random gloves. For…reasons.

S: Right you are. Did you see that meteor last night? Big old fiery A. A for angel, of course, signifying Winthrop’s new status as either a winged human or a flying sphere covered in eyes, depending on which scriptures of the Bible you choose.

What will happen next? Will Dimmsdale continue to feel super guilty all the time? Will Chillingworth continue to be awful? Will Hester continue to be scorned? Even though I haven’t read that far yet I can guarantee that all that and more will definitely occur in next week’s edition of The Scarlet Letter!